Co-Active Leadership with Karen and Henry Kimsey-House

are in listen only mode good afternoon my name is Becky Robinson and I'm here today with Karen and Henry kimy house from co-active and we're going to talk today about a new

leadership story Henry and Karen I'm so happy to have you with us today we're deled to be here delighted this is such a pleasure uh for those of you who don't know Karen and Henry this week are

celebrating the launch of their latest book co-active leadership and it's been an amazing celebration so far my team and I are so honored to support and celebrate you Karen and Henry and the

difference this book is going to make in the world so as we're getting started and as some people are uh still arriving to the event today I want to highlight a few um technical items and some

housekeeping issues um starting with today's slides um often those of you who participate in our events want to know if you're going to receive the slides and yes today we will provide these

slides as a PDF so you can relax don't worry about scribbling down notes or coping down graphs we will provide these to you after the event to add value for you and the second thing I want to let

you know is that we invite you to live tweet today you'll see in the chat that we are using the hashtag coactive leadership and we would love to have you share your insights and ideas throughout

the event I will not be live tweeting today uh I'm going to give my full attention to Karen and Henry in making sure this event goes smoothly but we would love to see your tweets after the event and any value you want to share

with your online communities um another thing that you might want to know is that we are recording today's event and we'll share that with you as well um we also have a special giveaway toward the

end of today's event and so I'd like to make sure that you stay till the end uh Karen and Henry are going to present for uh uh the time in the beginning and share with us about the book and the model and then we're going to open up

for your questions so you can feel free at any time to put those questions in the question panel and I'll be sharing those with Karen and Henry at the end of the event um and as I said we're going to have a special giveway so you want to

stick with us through all those questions so you can find out um about what that giveaway is I wonder what we're going to give away you know it's a

book launch week uh I have some M&M's behind my desk you think anybody um perhap a llama yes exactly so I'd like to take a moment for everyone

to get familiar with our question panel and that's the place you can answer questions later and I'd love to know we're going to ask a question in a moment about um who is present on today's call and Karen is going to

launch a poll to get a sense of who's here with us today but um the poll does not include geographic regions so if you want to tell us today where you're calling in from

um that would be fantastic and um I'm calling in from my um new office in the state of Michigan I've not yet ever done a webinar from our actual physical

office looks like we have folks from Virginia Texas Vancouver Detroit Dubai Pennsylvania California

Arizona uh Florida Washington DC uh South Carolina um Vancouver Indiana Illinois Colorado um Texas Manitoba oh

my goodness we have people from all over the US and all over the world who are joining this webinar it looks like you all figured out how to use the question panel um hi to all of you thanks for being with us I think Dubai wins the

furthest away oh there a Kuwait there too they're about equal yeah we have Indonesia now though that could be farther uh there he is thanks to all of you for sharing where you're calling

from Karen and Henry I believe you're in California yes we are so I should have said good morning to the two of you um I want to just take a quick moment to introduce you formally I imagine that

your reputation precedes you and that most of the folks on this call are aware of the tremendous work that the two of you have been doing in the world um but as you might imagine Karen and Henry

kimsey house are a couple they founded the coaches Training Institute which is also known as CTI back in 1992 and CTI is a global coaching and

leadership development organization that offers programs in 18 different countries more than 4,000 people have completed the co-active leadership program and are bringing these

principles to organizations governmental agencies educational settings nonprofits coaching clients and families around the world um and Karen as you and I talked before this event you said that one of

the things you wanted to be clear about is that you're so excited to engage and share and show love to this group today and so I know it's just going to be a tremendous treat I am going to turn my

camera off and mute myself and allow the two of you to take it from here but thank you so much for your generosity and sharing your content with us today thanks for hosting us Becky yeah such a

pleasure hello everyone this is Karen kimsey house and this is Henry kimsey house this is the first we've done lots of webinars before but this is the first time we've actually done it with the the

web hams on so some of you are fortunate enough or unfortunate enough to actually see us live as we're doing this I think the picture down below is much better

it's sort of got better light it's on our deck the oceans behind us that kind of thing but these are sort of fun you get to see this in our office too yes so we're so excited to be here with you

today and talk about a new leadership story um because that's why we wrote the book coactive leadership five ways to lead because we wanted to tell new

leadership story we felt that it was time in the world for a new leadership story so we're going to spend about a half an hour going through some content and then we're going to leave plenty of time at the end to answer your questions

so as we're talking along as Becky said do uh type your questions in to the question box we look forward to getting to them which is really good news because a half hour is about a quarter

of the length of time it takes to read the book it's a short very easy to read book what is co-active Karen so um before we answer the question what is collective I just want to see a little

bit about who's here and LS our first poll while you're looking at this slide okay so let me see if I can select the poll I'm not really great at it you know what I think we're just gonna skip the

poll do it would you launch the poll for me Henry I will okay let's find out who's here we want you to select one of the following this

is my first experience with COA I've taken coactive courses I'm a certified professional coactive coach and I'm a graduate of the coactive leadership program any one of those are

in particularly and individually wonderful so if you just click the box so we know who's here that would be great oh this is so

cool we we normally do uh these polls I I'm going to show you the results in a minute because but we normally do these polls and it's just exactly flipped and uh um it's so exciting to see the this poll that we're going to show you in

just a second here it comes right G to show it right now close it Karen okay all right that sounds great close it and share the results so 71% of you this is your first

experience with Collective welcome we're really glad to be talking to you today 177% of you have taken Collective courses 8% of you are a certified Collective coach and 4% of you are

graduates of the coactive leadership program wow that's amazing thank you for being here all and it helps us understand a little bit about um what to focus on in our webinar this morning so

I guess we should really start by talking to you about what is coactive what do we mean when we say coactive because if we're going to talk about coactive leadership you probably want to know what that word means so now you

want to be there yes right we did that what a teamwork speaking of coactive So Co active is a wonderful way to we're we we are discovering to

approach the world um from a place of co- which is being and relationship and this sort of uh the idea of opening and

connecting um first that we come from relationship and connection and uh the being end of things first in the first instant and then we go into active which

is about the doing and task and focus and ttention and purpose and it's connected by that Dash that hyphen which

is all about and or Paradox holding that we're engaged in both of those energies together in every moment and every time both parts are really important um would

we move together into action then the actions we take are whole and integrated and connected and if you who are listening on the webinar will pause just a minute and think about your experience

of the world around you you'll notice that so very very often active comes first and we become focused on the objectives the outcomes the results and

the goals without paying attention to relationship and to people and the the absolute truth not like it's because Karen kimsey house said it because it is

so is that we are connected we are related whether we like it or not whether we wish we were or not you know um our experiences of recent world

events the impact of uh tsunami or uh uh you know a financial downturn in another part of the world affects all parts of the world so let's become very clear

that we are a part of one Humanity one human race and when we open up to that relationship with each other and that connection with all of life then we can

move into actions that are whole and integrated and include the very best of all the people involved the challenge with our modern world is that we've been

sort of dropping the co and focusing totally on T on actions tactics methods

um skills and tasks and it becomes Our Lives become very engaged in getting the job done without being in connection and so there's a lot of people who are

burning out and frying and people who are are leaders who shouldn't be leaders and they leaders who call themselves leaders who are actually managers of tasks getting done well and so many

leaders um are feel lonely and isolated and alone we want to change that so we want to give a new def definition where actually have the hubris to seek to

redefine leadership for us leaders are those who are responsible for their world leaders are those who are responsible for their world so let's talk a little bit about

what we mean we mean by responsible because it's such a absolutely loaded and heavy word it's usually it's usually thought of is a word that carries a burden yeah like it's it's often

confused with things like Duty and obligation and sacrifice we really think about responsible as having a co- aspect and

an active aspect uh the co-active the co- aspect is literally I am able to respond to my world I'm in relationship

with my world in such a way that I'm able to respond I'm present I'm alive I'm awake I'm available I'm

ready and the active aspect is literally I create my world I am the one who is responsible for actually making my world the way it is through my thoughts

actions and deeds um I I I create over and over again every day and every moment the world I'm living in so I'm literally responsible for it now this

isn't some Pana idea um of course the circumstances of Life happen you know um challenging things happen we lose our

job people die um most recently um I herniated a disc between my third and fourth uh lumbar spine and that's been quite something that's had quite an

impact on my life so circumstances come to us all when we say create your world what we're really talking about is what do you do with the circumstances that

come to you so in the instance of my back I could either lie down and be a victim and feel sorry for myself and trust me I did do a little bit of that not being Noble here or I can really

look at what there is for me to learn how there is for me to grow from what life is giving me I can notice that I'm overworking and I'm not paying enough attention to the co- inactive in my own

life so I can open and embrace the circumstances of my life and thereby create a rich resonant experience of being alive regardless of what life sends

me and I love this picture because this is such a a graphic I graphic thing of leaders who are responsible for the world here he is taking a piece of world

the piece of Earth and literally creating something as it it with it with his hands and I just this is the way we create our world it's this physical yeah

what I also love about it is that it has you know grit and spine it's you know you got to get your hands dirty it's not some losty concept his whole body here

is involved in the creation so there is some excitement and some enthusiasm and some engagement and some curiosity about the life that we're

creating so then the other part of the premise that we put forward in the book is that everyone is a leader everyone if our

world is to survive if our world is to survive Humanity's Onslaught everyone needs to start taking responsibility for their world and uh in

in our work the way we want to look at it is is that leadership is not something that's um sort of a destiny of

the few it's instead a responsibility of everyone and when everyone really takes responsibility for what's happening for

the initiative for the plan for the organization for the family for the marriage for the relationship then that creation that

leadership is is as we said before is whole and it draws out the best of everyone involved so that the solutions

that we arrive at are more diverse have a broader reach and are more whole and we're able to really lean into each

other 100% 100% and create from each other I I really think it's how we can

um not only withstand but also overcome and create from the hardships of what it means to be a human being the good and

the dark is by really giving oursel to that responsibility and leaning into each other and creating that story together and this is how we began our model we began our model and began

looking at this book from a point of view of what was happening a few years ago during the Arab Spring and during occupying movement all at the same time

we notice Circles of people gathering together where everyone and the sort of cynical press was calling it leader less and we recognized that things would not

be happening if leadership wasn't there and we started to read about it being leaderful and that leadership was moving around the circle well how does that happen and how do we then take

leadership and bring that into organizations systems and communities and have leadership move around the circle with everyone taking responsibility for the leadership that's

occurring because the the the more hierarchical sort of top- down command and control models of leadership with one person at the top is not only in

effective it's also not particularly accurate in any in any initiative or Endeavor or or with any activity we actually move through a number of different expressions of leadership in

any given day so leadership actually is not a role it's not assigned it's not a title it's a way of being and engaging with our world and it's can be very very

fluid and very very agile and we feel that this is a a primary key for us as human beings to be able to resolve so

many of the challenges that we're facing in our world by working together because we believe that we

create our world period together period everyday period this is what it when we talk about responsible for our world this is

the active of responsible right here I think of my world I think of my business and we're working on doing some

big culture change at CTI uh our business is named CTI the coach's training institute and it's so clear to me that that if the culture is to shift

that it's something that everyone has to participate in we are creating that culture every day together what are we creating and is it what we want and what we choose to be creating

together um I'm the head of the organization in conjunction with Henry and another partner we can't just you know uh sort of lob out an initiative about culture change and have it filter

down through the quote masses and expect anything really to happen it it needs to be contributed to and everyone needs to participate to create that new culture

at CTI so this applies whether we're talking about an or organization whether we're talking about a nonprofit whether we're talking about a smaller community and whether we're talking about a family

whether we're talking about a marriage the marriage the relationship the world of that partnership is created together every day by how we think by how we feel

and by how we communicate with each other so the question and becomes for us to look at what are we creating together is it what we want is it what we choose

is it what we feel the best use of our shared talents and abilities and if it's not then it's easy to make a different choice and try to create something different it's not that it happens

overnight but as we work together and really understand that we're responsible we can engage with what's happening around us in a way that's Dynamic and

alive and whole and most of all loving most of all coming from our hearts what's the next slide Karen so we've

created a model um which is featured in the book it's the collective Leadership Model and um the name of the book is the COA is coactive leadership five ways to lead so we're talking on and on about

how the person at the front or the person at the top isn't the only leader and how uh leadership is a function of being responsible for your world here are some different ways or some

different lenses for you to look through or to stand in to be responsible so we want to go through them with you and so that you can understand them um the other thing I want to say before we go

through them is that this model is meant it's designed for you it's meant for you to use to take in and uh to your workplace to your teams to your families and practice and play with it you're

going to learn so much more than what we have to tell you by your own experience so you know you'll get the recording and the the slides of this um webinar you're

welcome to use whatever we have here and we really want to encourage you to put it into use because that's that's really what's going to have the biggest impact on your world one of the things before we go into this model one that I love

the most about this model is that this model was cre I noticed that people there's many people from all over North America on this call today and I want you to know that in the creating of this

model in this book about two two and a half years ago I took a a around North America Tour and had meetings with conversation with people all over North

America uh and I couldn't get to Europe because it just wasn't set to do this time but we had conversations and in those conversations this model emerged

one one conversation after the other after the other and then it showed up in in uh a summit or a conference we did and then it evolved from there and it's

totally evolved from the field from out here in the world it Evol involved it didn't involve from one person us sitting down and drawing circles well we

also Henry we also consulted with our communities um internationally in uh Europe in the United Arab Emirates in

Southeast Asia so all around the world we also talked to other communities um that are a part of CTI and we got their input for this model so it was created in small

conversations um with Henry as he did his sort of tour around all of North North America and also in conversations internationally um and that's this is

what emerged and each of these circles uh each of these words are dimensions and they're dimensions of occu like you sort of choose to step into her occupy a

dimension and each one is a dimension of leadership let's start with di mention of leader within so leader within is really the foundation it's why it lies

at the center because this is the place from which we choose it is the place we know ourselves in our leadership and the co- and the act of leader of leader

within is self-acceptance and self-responsibility self-acceptance and self-responsibility we're so used to looking outside of ourselves for who we

should be and what we should do and what we should look like and it is only when we let go of that and really turn our attention to our own heart and our own

wisdom and our own desires can our most powerful self truly emerge there's a self Authority that also exists in leader within that is about about really

being the author of your life being the one who is creating um your the truth of who you are through your purpose and your values and walking the talk of

Integrity of your life and when that one in you is living in that diamond at the center of yourself um and walking

through life um it's when we see that when we see people doing that we sort of just want to line up and see what they're up to and we want to fill our lives with the same thing and so that's

why it's actually a leadership Dimension this leader within is not intending to lead and yet they end up leading because they're living their life in such Integrity it's sort of like the quote

from um uh Gandy be the change that you want to see so living your life with wholeness and integrity is actually a function leadership and it comes from

inside yourself and then it shines out into the world and contributes your unique individual and spectacular Hess

and truth and wisdom and it's from this leader within that we choose to enter any of the other dimensions this is also the one in us who chooses as opposed to

the one in us who reacts so just to before we move to the other diff uh Dimensions I want to just say something about the difference between choosing or creating and

reacting because the distinction is really really important uh reaction is a patterned response we will respond that way over

and over again out of habit out of limiting beliefs um out of just not particularly being awake to what we're doing of our synapses running a certain

way we think we should right that's not bad that's not wrong it's human and it's limiting um um creating or responding really happens

in the moment because we're present and awake and alive we've done our work and and sort of cleaned out our basement and our limiting beliefs and we're available to respond freshly to whatever is

happening around us so one really great thing you can all practice on on this webinar if you want to really get your hands around this model and the fluidity and Agility of coactive leadership is to

practice whether you're reacting whether you're moving from a patterned place and a familiar place or whether you're responding freshly and in a moment so which di menion shall we explore first

here let's go to leader in front because this is the one that most people uh think is a leader uh and it's confused a lot with leader on

top leader in front has uh has has a Clear Vision they have a clear sense of where they want everyone to go and it's Crystal Clear and they put their stake

in the ground and say we are going this way and they have ability the same time that's the active of leader in front and at the same time the co of it is they are deeply in conversation with their

world so that and and in relationship and conversation uh I love David White's new work David White the poet's new work on leadership he he talks a lot about

the nature of leadership is really based in the conversation and this leadership he's talking about leader in the front the ability to be have a clear vision and be able to articulate that Vision be moving towards it and at the same time

be in deep conversation with the people you're um uh leading through that Vision people can't buy in if they can't weigh in so it's through these deeper

conversations that people become connected to the initiative and then leader in front becomes powerful and resonant and whole so we have lots and

lots of examples of leader in front where it isn't working where it feels feels like they've lost certainly many aspects of the political race in the

United States today are really really great examples of leader in front not working so when leader in front isn't working what's missing is people the relationship to the people that the

leader in front is serving and leading and through those conversations and through that relationship leader in front becomes incredibly co-active

powerful related and connected another reason we wrote this book is because we wanted to be give leaders in front the permission to sit down because a lot of

times leaders in front get they get sort of poed or launched into this position of leader in front or leader on top and they don't know how to sit down their

ego won't let them or their world won't let them and often they need to be able to sit down and actually step into one of the other dimensions and let others step up front that's really one of the

most powerful dimensions of good leadership is veloping leadership in others and it's only by really sitting down when you're in front and making room for other people to come forward

with their leadership that um leadership is whole and um includes everyone then we go to a leader behind um leader

behind is the leadership of service the servant leader the idea that I as a leader am responsible for my world by

serving what's needed by serving the who's in who's in front or serving the stake or serving what it is that we're

all trying to create together and and it's I'm I'm growing it I mean service is sort of the co of it and the other is coaching I'm asking questions I'm

curious I'm developing I'm um putting this this idea or this person that is leading in front forward and having them

be impeccable and wonderful so just to be clear leader behind doesn't mean um um sort of surrendering or just following along or complying it's a very

very powerful Dimension make no mistake leaders behind are the backbone of any Endeavor and when they when they come from this place of generosity and

service to the initiative um everyone feels connected to what's happening and things move forward in a good way you know and when they really give

themselves to championing to celebrating to acknowledging and to powerful deep listening the the key skills of coaching and supporting others um leadership

moves forward one of the things the traps that we get into with leader behind is we assume that leader behind equals follower or equals um passenger

or victim you know those are all sort of the negative expressions of this the leader behind is totally responsible for what's occurring in from a place of service as opposed to place of

communicating Vision which is what the front is so on on this call right now all of you who are listening in and thank you for listening in imagine yourself in a class or a workshop or

some kind of a group situation when there is a a person at the front who's talking and rather than just being a participant and sitting and taking notes imagine you're turning your attention to

leader behind and to really paying attention to what you might be able to contribute to have things go well what did what's a question you can ask that will really serve how can you really

move things forward not only does your experience shift but the whole experience for everyone involv shifts that's the power and the glory actually of leader

behind the the the two other dimensions that we're going to talk about our leader beside and leader in the field are the ones that are the most undeveloped and unappreciated dimensions of leadership that we want to really

develop and bring more appreciation to let's start with leader beside leader beside is that the idea that partnering

co-leading collaborating with another or several others um actually will produce a more powerful leadership Synergy uh where where the

the the the way that emerges to lead and where we're going is actually more powerful and more potent than the sum of any of us put together would be and we want to be clear about this Dimension

because so many examples we see of supposed leader beside actually involve you're good at this I'm good at that we'll divide the responsibilities and we'll delegate work forward together or

we're we're co-leading an event or something like that this is your part this is my part you do your part I'll do my part and then we're leading beside that's not leading beside that's kind of

your turn my turn leading beside really is the synergistic combination of two people so for instance Henry and I are co-presidents of CTI with John belli

with John belli are co-president so it's it's not that we we all three have to do everything some of us take one thing and some of us take another thing from time to time but we really are working

together and leaning in to whatever we're doing at 100% all of us so that whatever the outcome is has the best of

the three of us we call it you know the Third Way not your way not Henry's way not my way not John's way but a way that is more synergistic and more whole you

know most of us on this call have a real deep experience of leader beside going back to our childhood it was that time when you know you were in trouble with a

teacher or a parent and and you grabbed a sibling or a best friend and you brought them in to face the music with you you know because they held you they held you account they were they had your

back they were you were leaning in and there was a way that you were able to be stronger and stand up more powerfully in that environment then you two would leave that same environment and you

would go out and do something and you would take risks together with that same person that you wouldn't take alone and that's the nature of leader beside it's

it has the capability of of me taking more risk because I know my partner over there on my other side has my rope will take will will will reain me in if I go

too far you know and at the same time I have their rope so I'm held it accountable much more accountability exists in this model of leader be side than any other of the leadership models

at the same time I will take greater risks right so then moving to the last dimension of uh you ready to go to the field Henry leader in the field leader

in the field is is the opportunity of of really experiencing the energetic field and all that's going on around in between the

people and so it includes the people it but it also includes everything else so it's like it the best metaphor I can think of is is taking a helicopter ride

above the situation and looking down on the situation and seeing all the flow all the way things are moving from the past to the Future and seeing things and then looking into that flow looking into

that field and then reporting what you see or you hear or what you sense back to the back to the people so that so that it will actually inform what's

happening to the rest to the circle you know I know that this Dimension can seem um sometimes esoteric and difficult to grasp but it's not there is in fact an

energetic field that surrounds all of life recent uh scientific work has uh revealed dark matter and that we only know what Dark Energy in Dark Energy how much is the percentage of what we don't

know Henry something like 90% of uh what's out there we have no clue about right so there's a lot of quote information that isn't available in a

book or in a in research or in a study it's not known but you can a access it fairly easily by letting go of what you know which takes a little bit of Courage

because we're very used to having the answer and really opening to our intuition and our instinct which are both naturally occurring phenomenons in all of us well and to are multiple

senses um uh there's lot there also scientific research being done by some people saying there's many many more than five senses and that those senses are actually real senses of picking up

energy and picking up different things that are invisible and so we have like like is not visible smell is not visible and uh vision is not smellable so what

are all the other ways we have of sensing things and and how do we start honoring those ways of sensing and then reporting what we're sensing so the first part the co-art of leader in the

field is intuition and instinct and the active part is innovation Having the courage to speak from or act from what

you sense and feel even though it's not proven or not known one of my favorite examples of this is um the very famous um Canadian I think uh hockey player

Wayne greki who would always say I don't skate to where the puck is I skate to where the puck is going to be how did he know now he's a very experienced athlete

he's done you probably had done lots and lots of practicing but in that moment he had to open to the energetic field and sense what was trying to happen and then

have the courage to move to that place knowing that that was where the the puck was going to be another example of this I think is um Steve Jobs an Apple computer in general right and able to

really innovate and create things that we didn't even know we wanted you know I know that when the first iPod came out I wasn't sitting around thinking I wish I wish somebody would really create an

iPod it was Innovative so as you access leader from the field you have information that allows you to innovate and come up with really fresh unique

solutions that aren't proven or known but will take your initiative or your relationships to a whole new dimension so really Henry said it as the earliest uh the earliest part of leader in the

field the best way to explain this to other people I think is just to talk about taking a helicopter up above what happening a little helicopter ride and look and see if you notice the patterns

that's a good way to talk about it so these are the dimensions of co-active leadership and you're never in only one I mean you're I mean you sometimes I

shouldn't I take that back you are sometimes only in one that's fine but the key is to be in one not to be off the model because then we're usually a passenger or we're we're a victim of

life or we're codependent or we're hooked in or all the different things that that we get caught up in by being here we're at choice and we're actually taking responsibility for the world and

we suggest that you're in one of these Dimensions that that several of you have developed um competencies most of you have develop competencies in one of

these Dimensions maybe several and maybe you have some areas of development and growth and in one or several and that's where we want to get into the discussion

now of course because we're all comfortable in some place but if we stay in the place where we're comfortable our responses become patterned and reactive

rather than creative and fresh so the the important thing about the model is to really teach yourself to be agile and learn to move from one dimension to the

other fluidly or to choose Dimensions that are not normally comfortable for you so how do you become more fasel with this Dimension with this model you

practice and it's important to practice Dimensions that aren't necessarily your real your real house you can always lean into those when the chips are down but do practice the ones that aren't

familiar so that you can grow and expand your ability as a leader and the other thing that's really cool about this particular model is it's a really communicable model so those of you who want to take it to your Consultants or

you want to take this into your business or your world or your community or your family you can just bring it in have them practice coming from each of the dimensions and pretty soon you're in this language of these dimensions and people are actually taking

responsibility from these different dimensions it's a if you have Team where people are fighting for you know control or where there where there's a lot of competition to be in the front bring out

this model and explain the different dimensions and then people can choose which dimension that they want to play in and then have it move so that they are practicing all of the dimensions it has everyone be a leader and it eases

the tension of trying to prove who's at the top or who's at the front so Henry I think it's about time for us to take some questions is there anything you want to oops I'm not looking at you I'm looking at my screen anything else I

want to see you wcky with some questions for us great yeah I'm I'm thrilled to share some and thank you so much I've been scribbling notes furiously and as I'm sure many others on this uh call

have been um I'm going to start with a question that came in from Craig and he's wondering is there a connection between the within Dimension and mindfulness or is there a place that you

see this idea of mindfulness coming into play with this model oh I love this question Craig I think mindfulness is a key to the model not just the within but

in any of the dimensions it's only by mindfulness and by being present and mindful that we can make that distinction we were talking about earlier between uh reacting and

responding or creating well I also think Craig that the within is the place where we choose and we can't it's difficult to

truly choose if we're not mindful because uh if we're not in mindfulness because uh very often uh the mindfulness or the Consciousness that or awareness

that's created in that leader within is what allows us to make a honest Choice as opposed to coming from a learned behavior or reaction yeah thanks so I'm going to go to a

question that came in earlier when we were first starting uh to talk about the leader within and an posed the question about responsibility so she's curious about how you see the overlap of

responsibility and accountability um I love these are great questions thanks thank you an um I think that they're

um I was going to say they're synonymous but I don't think they're synonymous I think they uh go together Henry how would you well accountability is is what

how we know something is R real and so responsibility without accountability is a good idea or a nice conversation or a nice conversation responsibility with accountability makes

it real and so every one of these Dimensions the responsibility of of being a co-active leader the responsibility for your world must have accountability both internal

accountability I mean they go together internal accountability or in many of these Dimensions outside accountability the leader in front is actually accountable to the people he's in

conversation with and to his vision or her vision well and you know I just thought of something as you were talking Henry um we think of accountability as being something that someone else holds

us to like managers hold their direct reports accountable and so on and so forth I was just thinking about my life and I realized that one of the ways I fortify my own

responsibility is by ensuring I'm in relationships that hold me accountable not just for the actions that I say I will do do although that's important but

also for who I am so in my relationship with Henry or in my relationship with people that I work with I I um strive to ensure that they're reflecting reflecting back to me and that they're

invited to reflect back to me when I'm not um being or acting in a way that is a reflective of the best of myself that's another form of accountability so

it's one of the ways I actually fortify responsibility in myself by ensuring that I have accountability all around and also by offering it to others I don't offer them accountability so that

I can be unhappy with them if they don't do what they say they're going to do I offer them accountability so that that can deepen and fortify their responsibility for their world and for what's happening around them I want to

add one more thing I realized too like this question you can tell uh we uh accountability is often focused on the active or the task other

words in a task-based world we need accountability to get tasks done and in a it's interesting but in a co-active

world uh where it we're focusing equally on the being and the doing what happens is accountability becomes important not just for getting things done it becomes

important for also how we're being and that's goes back to the mindfulness question again is so so we want to keep creating structures that are not just

about holding us accountable to get the task done we want to be held accountable for who we're being while we're getting the task done and that's a huge big

challenge because that's how we really take responsibility for the world we have to be the change we want to make right and so we have to be held as accountable for that being as we are for what we do what he said that was I was

trying to say that but Henry said it better well a few comments are coming in and I I love this idea about being accountable for who we want to be in the world and who we want to become and not

only the things that we're doing and Ann who had asked the question uh shared that comment uh Mary also had a comment that responsibility with accountability is what helps us grow and I thought that

was very profound so thank you for that Mary um I have a couple several more questions coming in um and this one comes from um and forgive me on these names we have some International names

uh prianka I hope I said your name correctly um here's the question so how do we get Buy in from our teams and help them understand the value of a model like this one and how each one can help

the individual team members grow as Leaders um because I think uh the comment here is that most of the time we're focused on just getting the job done right so how can we get by in from

people to really be thinking about their leadership in this way great I think it's uh you start by telling them that they're already leaders everyone is a leader so everyone is a leader here's a

model to practice leadership it's still important that we get the job done this model has to do with who we're being together while we're getting the job done we will be more effective as we practice here and then you really sit

down and let them practice and the truth is you have to have commitment from everybody on the team from the people who most teams are currently structured hierarchically even though they're

supposed to be structured circular circularly so the team is often has a team leader and then lots of people who are doing what the team leader wants so that's a lot of the way teams are

constructed and we're really talking about creating a team where everyone's responsible and so in order to do that you need to actually get together with the team and have a conversation about

how can everyone be responsible for this this team in in some way some people are going to choose different forms or different dimensions of leadership in order to do that so one way to do that

is with your team is actually create an exercise where people experience a challenge from the different dimensions so in other words

like literally put them in into a place and and have face a leadership challenge or something and then experience what the opinion or advice would be from the leader in the front the opinion or advice from leader from behind leader

beside and listen and then choose which way they want to play and it's amazing how just a little exercise like that all of a sudden opens up comprehension and understanding in the body to actually

begin incorporating this i' I've been done done it with several different communities businesses and teams now and it's one of the quickest graspable

models uh so cellularly that I've come across does that help I think so Karen anything you want to add yes I do actually um I'm gonna I love what you said about the exercise I am going to

disagree with one thing that Henry said we'll disagree with each other often actually I don't think that everyone has to be uh 100% committed to the model to

begin I think you start and then you let people find their way you know so often we try something new and it doesn't work and then we say well we know it wouldn't

work because you know everybody is not bought in and there you go and it's all about just getting the job done just begin introduce the model Henry's exercise is wonderful to have them

experience a challenge through each of the DI different dimensions and look at how they might respond it gives them a place to start and then be patient and see what comes and continue to practice

and play with the model and over time people will begin to find their way to it rather than having to you know be bought in and excited about the thing right from the very beginning see how in

leader beside there's room for disagreement and out of the disagreement there's actually a new thing emerges right what what just happened there

great I love that so there are a couple of questions on a common theme of how we can actually practice being awake and present um and that question came from two places and uh part of this came from

Brenda she said you know when work gets overwhelming what can we do to get ourselves back to being Mindful and present to these realities oh it's so easy I know that's

true in my own life too Brenda I am so committed to being a whole leader and the next thing I know I'm there on my to-do list like it's the most important things in the world so there are two

practices that I have found that help me a lot um number one to remember to take a breath brething breathing take a breath it's always a good idea to breathe and I

actually set a little timer on my watch on my computer to beep every half hour or so so that I remember to

pause relax my body and take a deep breath it takes about 30 seconds and I feel returned and grounded um and the other thing that I find really useful

for me and Henry might have a different practice is to move I don't mean going for a 45 minute walk I mean just shifting my body position so I might take a breath or I might take a little

walk around my office for a moment and look out the window at the day and notice whether it's sunny or rainy or whether it's a beautiful day or not or what's happening right outside in all of

life that takes about maybe 20 seconds and I feel returned and restored to Hess so there's tons of practices that are beautiful and wonderful about you know

finding my fness and finding wholeness and you know meditation and so many other things that are really really good but I find that sometimes during my day it's hard for me to access those things

and I find that breath and movement uh cued by my wonderful computer in my Apple watch help me really stay in that place of mindfulness yeah I was gonna say my Apple watch tells me to stand

every hour so it's like that's really helpful yeah um one one thing I want to add to what Karen's saying is that there's a I have dream you know in in this world of

emails and everything else I have a dream that that every task that we have no matter how minute whether it's a tweet or a email or whatever there is a

moment just a brief little moment where there's a breath a connection to heart and then a looking at what needs to happen like a choosing where I want to come from with this that every single

moment every task actually is grounded in some sort of being and if we can get to that kind of a practice where we really can ground ourselves with a breath a heart connection and a boom

then we're going to discover there's a lot of things in our list that don't need to be there oh I just just I just realized Henry one other thing that I do that I didn't even realize I do I would

I pause and think about who what person am I touching if I'm writing an email who's it too if I've uh planning uh you

know if I'm planning a workshop who is it for whatever the action is if I can for me anyway if I can connect it to a human being with breath and with a

little movement and with heart then I'm returned to mindfulness and I'm I'm back in relationship again and then I can move forward into action again losing no momentum really and feeling in

relationship with my world so the the short answer to your beautiful question that we've given many answers to is make sure that the co is in front of the active

yeah that makes a lot of sense I love that um and it is a beautiful thing to be able to think about slowing down enough to bring that intention to every action um Chris has a question for us um

and he mentions that you spoke of Courage earlier um wondering do you draw a distinction between courage and fearlessness as it relates to

leadership oh I do um Henry doesn't but I do we do and we don't I'll tell you why I do um I think

fearlessness um means that we should have no fear and I think that fear is a important part of a human experience I think that courage is really about you

know um how Henry defines it which is the rich yes please hand me go ahead cor heart and rage this is my way of defining it the Rage of the heart and I

think what I think where I think it comes from is when they you jump a horse over an obstacle and order to get a horse over an obstacle you you the horse and the rider have to throw their heart

over the fence first and so courage is about throwing your heart over the fence before you know what's on the other side and there will be some fear in that and that's part of the part of what courage

is about is the Rage of the heart throwing the heart over the fence and then following it so for for me Chris fearlessness feels a little um

dominating and like I should shouldn't be shouldn't have fear or I should get rid of my fear or that fear's a bad thing and for me that's putting too much attention on the fear courage feels

expansive and inspiring to me as I throw my heart over that fence of where my vision wants to take me and I sort of Tuck the fear underneath my arm like a like a footall helmet or something you

know and I move into action so that's the distinction for me wow I just love that um I think we only have time for about one more question I do want to thank all of you who have taken the time

to share your questions and thoughts and you know it's possible in the days and weeks ahead that I might Inspire Karen and Henry to answer some of these questions in a blog post or article that we can share with all of you um so this

last question um is really going to bring us back to the model so um the thought here is that we tend to default to one or two of these leadership ways of being and have to

learn and practice the others and so what we'd like to do um Ann's question here is has that been your experi experience and can you talk to us a little bit about um that defaulting to

certain ways of being as a leader and how you might challenge us to practice more of these ways of being of course we default to certain ways of being in our leadership we're

rewarded and acknowledged for producing results and if we produce results as leader in the front or if we're a really really strong leader behind we're

rewarded for that so it's understandable that we would fall into those patterned responses and it's an act of courage actually as Chris pointed out earlier on

to begin to practice in the dimensions with which we are less comfortable and I think it takes real um commitment and a lot of a lot of

um uh oh lost you lost your voice there Karen and a lot of willingness to experiment and to fail um to really expand into these other

dimensions the the payoff for that is that our leadership is so much more expanded whole and satisfying if we're willing to do that so don't make

yourself wrong if you find yourself you know consistently responding from one dimension that's understandable noticing it is 90% of the battle just notice that

and make a commitment to practice one of the other ones that feels less familiar for you and your leadership will expand in all kinds of amazing ways Henry is there anything you want to add to that

yeah I want to redefine the Fe the field of dimensional of leadership development to me leadership development is no longer about case studies of what good

leaders did to me leadership development is how do we learn to occupy fully each of these dimensions of leadership and be

able to move elegantly and with great agility from Dimension to Dimension depending on what's needed by our world so that we can truly take responsibility

for our world and how how do you create a world where that's fun and playful and um inviting and uh exciting rather than

beautiful and hard and it becomes our responsibility as developers of leaders which all leaders are by the way if we're a leader we're also responsible for developing leaders I mean that's

just the nature of it we are in the we are responsible for actually working with people in developing their competencies and capabilities in each of these dimensions and so if there's

Dimensions that you know you're more confident in others share your competency with those Dimensions with other people if there's Dimensions you're weak in get teaching get

development get go and and and find ways to develop your abilities in those other dimensions so that takes us actually to our last slide that we have for you and

uh I know have no slides for you give me just a second here wait did you were doing great I was doing great and I just blew it just a minute I'll get to the right slide uh failure right before your

very eyes that one so here's our last slide for you and this is what we want to close with you and then Becky will have a few comments for you um the heart is infinite in its capacity to love the

heart of collective leadership actually is love love yourself love each other love the experience of being a human being love your successes love your

failures love your Shadow and your light love and just know that your heart is infinite in

its capacity to love and that leaders we assert their main responsibility in being responsible for this world is to make a world filled with love bottom

line right amazing so um thank you so much for investing this hour with us Karen and Henry I'm inspired and I'm thinking and

I'm sure that those who have chosen to participate with us today feel the same way I want to make sure you know how to find out more about this amazing new book that Karen and Henry have gifted to

the world this week uh co-active leadership five ways to lead you can find out more and find places to buy the book at coactiv leadership.com and the book actually is available miraculously

um in audiobook for only $5 on Amazon which I was encouraged to hear I know many people appreciate um the opportunity to listen to books I'm a runner so I look forward to revisiting

these lessons while I listen to the audiobook so I want to encourage you to buy the book today I also encourage you to go to coactiv leadership.com and some of these Graphics that were shared in the slide presentation are there if they

resonated with you and you want to share this co-active leadership message with your fans and followers and colleagues please take a moment or two to share some of the messages from the website

with your communities I did mention a giveaway at the top of the hour I have 10 copies of co-active leadership in my office that I would love to share if you will email me Becky weaving

influence.com you should have my email address with your webinar invitation and what we'd like to hear from you in order to be um entered to receive one of the first 10 books is will you tell us um of

these um dimensions of leadership which ones are most comfortable for you which ones are most challenging and one action that you'd like to take today to practice a new dimension of Le

leadership and so I look forward to hearing from you Becky at weaving influence.com I'll be in touch with some additional followup and 10 of you will have a chance to receive a free copy of the book today uh so thank you so much

Karen and Henry thank you again for being with us today by be well